Friday, September 6, 2013

The Masculine/Feminine Roles

In her blog ROLES IN RELATIONSHIP, Dr. Jan stated things would be easier if we could have a clear definition of the masculine and feminine roles in relationships. The interesting thing about that type of definintion is the fact that the roles of masculine and feminine are actually part of each individual even apart from a relationship.
One of our favorite authors is Robert Johnson http://www.harpercollins.com/authors/4971/Robert_A_Johnson/index.aspx who penned several books dealing with the interaction of the masculine and feminine aspect of individuals. He has developed the concept that the masculine, also known as the Animus, is the part of each person that is the warrior/conqueror. It is that part of each of us that drives us toward greater achievement and accomplishment. It is also the aggressive part of our makeup that can be destructive if not consciously guarded.
The feminine side is called the Anima, and is the aspect of each individual that reflects compassion, nurturing, healing, and the gentleness of living. In each person, the goal would be to have the Anima and Animus work in harmony allowing a power of accomplishment to be balanced with a harmony of compassion. In most cultures the woman reflects the feminine side while the man reflects the masculine part of our emotional makeup. However, if the individual is not in touch with the opposite side of their emotional universe, then they are out of balance.
A male, who is not utilizing his feminine side, will be seen as aggressive and uncaring with a detached and non-nurturing persona. A woman who is not in touch with her masculine side will appear as soft, weak, and dependent. Obviously, the goal in the individual journey is to bring these two sides into harmony. Further, in the relationship of male and female, it is also necessary to bring these sides into balance if there is to be harmony and true love.
 Over the last centuries, the dominant male and supportive female has been a fairly normal interaction. However, in modern relationships, the masculine and feminine are not compartmentalized into defined roles and now the individuals in relationship need to find a balance in masculine and feminine not only in their individual walk, but also in the evolving romantic relationship with each other. No longer are the defined roles of masculine and feminine allocated to male and female, but now each individual is learning to embrace both their individual “anima and animus’ in order to live in harmony with each other.   We will look into this next time with some actual case studies we encountered. Dr.T

I Like Me

One of the primary requirements of good relationships is the ability to like yourself.  If we are counting on  someone to create our po...