Who am I? Part 1

One of the problems in any relationships is the potential loss of one persons identity to another persons demands. There will always be strong-willed people who are capable of being in charge and running things. These are leaders and we are blessed by their talent and ability. On the other hand there are those who do the work to complete the vision of the leader and we are also blessed by the fact that without the worker there would be no progress. When these two diverse approaches to life work in harmony, we see progress and accomplishment.

However, if a stronger personality takes control of another person and tries to transform them, this is not progress, it is slavery. In relationships, a lot of the struggle is this attempt to force another person to conform to a fixed guideline and expectation established by a stronger personality. The battle that comes from this unbalanced approach to life is disastrous to the individuals involved and a certain death to a healthy relationship.

In dealing with couples, one of the goals is for each partner to clearly define who they are in the relationship and what are the expectations they place on themselves and their partner. Interestingly enough, it is easier for couples to define the expectations they place on each other than it is to define who they are as individuals.

Ask yourself this simple question: Who am I?

This isn't a job description or a title, it is a definition of who you truly believe you are. If a person says "I believe I am weak", this now defines how they approach all of life and how they expect others to treat them. If the answer is "I believe I am loving" then they will both approach life and receive back from life with this same type of energy.

If I define myself as "peaceful" then why would I allow anger.
If I am giving, then what am I doing being selfish
If I believe I am broken, then I will bring more broken into my life.

When I know who I am and allow this belief to be a positive force in my life,  I will not allow others to steal my life from me and I will not need to steal life from others. Develop a belief that you are whole and happy with who you are. This is the beginning of a good relationship.  

We will continue this thought in our next blog - Who Am I? Part 2. Would like to know your thoughts and insights.