Equality in Relationships

Just what is equality in relationship and how does it work?  Obviously, equality is a belief I am not better nor worse than my significant other.  It is a place of harmony. In modern relationships, there is much lip service given to “equality”, but generally there is not a heartfelt desire to see our partner as an equal.

Equality is the power within relationships that affirms and values human beings as he or she IS and not the way we want them to be.

In a human relationship, love causes a man to see the intrinsic value in a woman: therefore, love leads him to honor and serve her, rather than improperly use her for his ego's intentions. When love is guiding him, he is concerned with her needs and her well-being; not fixated on his own wants and whims.

Human love causes a woman to see the intrinsic value in a man: he is not a projection of her unmet needs, but rather a soul whose journey she has the honor to encourage and nurture toward the joy of finding his journey’s fulfillment.

Generally, equality is easily extended as long as the other person does what I want, but if they don’t fit into my pattern of understanding they are no longer my equal, they are my enemy.  I will love you forever, as long as you don’t leave the cap off the tooth paste, don’t track in muddy shoes, don’t lie to me, don’t provide less than I am entitled in life. If you don’t live up to my demands and expectations, then you are a terrible person who I must either attack or retreat from for my own protection.


I often hear couples say, “My partner just seemed to change after we got married. I don’t know what happened.” The simple answer is they both lost their ability to see each other as equals.  As equals, we are mutually loving and mutually screwy, and that is just who we are!

So how do we maintain equality in relationships? 

Unconditional Self Acceptance (USA). If we really can accept ourselves unconditionally, love ourselves even with our crazy ways of living, and be at peace with our own illogical thinking and behavior, then we can obviously feel the same way about others. However, if we don’t like ourselves, then how much of a chance does our partner stand?

USA – Unconditional Self Acceptance. How unique would this type of relationships be? 

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My book about finding equality in relationships is called FOREVER YOURS. It is the fictional story of a man and women who fall in love in the 60's, raise a family and learn how to overcome the challenges of life in order to truly find their own relationship together. You can find out more at Amazon (click here). Or go to my website for more information. (Click here)